Thursday, October 4, 2012

FLASHBACK 1981~1982

"done looking for the critics 'cause they're everywhere...they don't like my jeans, they don't get my hair..."
she's walking thru the halls like a miniature terminator...angry...determined...looking for a fight. "get outta my way you fat cow!! i would kill myself if my a$$ was that big!" "learn from your parent's mistake...use birth control". most of the people could take care of themselves. but the special ed kids...they didn't have witty comebacks...and they couldn't fight. so, one day, i'm walking behind her and watch her push a girl into the lockers. i snap. i push her and tell her to leave the girl alone. well...that's BASICALLY what i said...i don't remember word for word and i'm sure it was a little more colorful...okay! okay!...A LOT more colorful, but that is basically what i said. OOPS! i spend the next school year being terrorized by ummmmm....let's call her *regina*. she's pushing me into lockers. she's calling me names. she's jumping me in the restroom. i fight back...i fight back every time...she backs off. for a little while. then she realizes something. i can't fight back in my cheerleading uniform. so she's lurking in the halls after games waiting for the moment i can't get her back....
FLASH FORWARD february 2012
"sheldon: you did it, leonard! you stood up to your bully! leonard:  Yeah, I feel pretty good about myself. You think we can outrun him? sheldon: i don't need to outrun him. i just need to outrun you!" 
the bk and i are watching "big bang theory"...it just happens to be an episode about bullying...my phone buzzes on the table between us. facebook message: *regina* has requested you as a friend. what?!! are you flippin kidding me?!! i don't deny requests, usually. seriously? does it hurt you, at all, being facebook friends with people you never even knew went to your high school? no. it doesn't. but *regina*? i had vowed that would be a request i would deny. but, when i got it, i thought: is it fair to assume she hadn't changed? so i debated. and debated. and debated. i asked betsy if she had talked to her as an adult. b "i have...she hasn't changed a bit". m "am i being childish if i deny her?". b "you don't need that in your life". IGNORE! 
FLASH FORWARD today
"i wish we could all get along like we used to in middle school... i wish i could bake a cake filled with rainbows and smiles and everyone would eat and be happy"
bullying has changed a lot since 1981. back then we had "your mama" jokes and "fat" jokes and fists. today, even though they have all those things, they also have the internet. they have facebook...and twitter...and youtube. today's bully can humiliate you on a global scale. but communities are rallying around the bullied...most recently, a teen nominated for homecoming court, as a prank, was escorted to the game in a hummer limo. her dress, hair styling, and make-up all donated by local businesses. she was even cheered on by the opposing team. click here to view her story.
october is bullying prevention month...and october 3rd is national mean girls day (sadly, i'm a day late)...
tips to prevent bullying:
#1~respond calmly, without losing your temper. giving in to your temper just gives the bully what they want.
#2~don't let them see you sweat. confidence is key. it sounds corny, but it really is true. if the bully doesn't think they are getting to you, they will move on. 
#3~stand by each other. if you witness bullying, and do nothing, then you are part of the problem.
#4~remember that bullying doesn't just happen in school or to students. it can happen in the workplace. it can happen on facebook. it can happen to you.
#5~try to remember this really isn't about you. it sounds cliche, but the bully really is the one with the problem.


 

1. heathers~the original mean girls
2. mean girls~how did they get a national day and heathers didn't?







 

2 comments:

  1. God, I never knew... all I saw was a beautiful, confident, strong, popular cheerleader.... guess I should have introduced myself and offered to beat up 'Regina'.... next time, if you need somebody beat up and Jamie isn't available... let me know... btw, my name in Mark and I'm not a robot

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    1. ha! thanks! i was skilled at taking care of myself, though...which is why she waited until i wasn't allowed to! lol

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