SUNDAY COMICS

"do your boobs hang low? do they wobble to and fro? can you tie 'em in a knot? can you tie 'em in a bow?"

FLASHBACK 2007/08 (my sources are a little sketchy here because...well...they're raelians and that's just weird)

claude vorilhon...who prefers to be called rael because he is, in fact, the leader of the raelians (which are members of the ufo religion called the raelian movement...which, i think, requires a whole other blog post)...starts an annual event called "go topless". the idea is simple. women are being oppressed because it's illegal for them to walk around town topless even though they're male counterparts can do as they please. never-mind that women really don't want to see moobies. 

FLASH FORWARD today

tomorrow is women's equality day, celebrating the day women earned the right to do something ACTUALLY worth while...vote. so, today, there will be protests all over the country, in an attempt to get women another right. the right to bare breasts. women will be topless (although most will wear pasties because the don't want to get arrested) and men are encouraged to cover their moobs with pasties or bras. i will be at a baseball game. with my top on. why? because great american ballpark is NOT st tropez. 

now, if you are interested in going around your city showing off your tatas, you can check out gotopless.org for more information. personally, i believe we should protest men's right to bare chests because...let's face it...unless you're channing tatum, you should probably keep your shirt on. 

ps...if you choose to go topless today understand that i'm not judging you. unless you have disgusting moobies. then, i am. i am totally judging you. 

WHAT UP WEDNESDAY

FLASHBACK 1978/79
kat and i are in 7th grade...and we love make~up. we. L~O~V~E make~up. we spend all of our free time listening to blondie and experimenting with mascara and eyeliner. we apply...and, then, we wash it all off with noxzema...drench our skin in seabreeze (we love the way our skin tingles)...and we start all over again. we get it wrong. we wear so much eye make~up you can't even see our eyeballs. 
FLASH FORWARD today
i still love make~up. and sometimes i like to experiment with a smokey eye...or a bombshell eye...or pin~up girl red lips. but, most of the time, i like to look like i'm not wearing any makeup. a natural look just fits my hippy freak personality. how do i get that look? cheaply.  with the exception of my clinique different lipstick (a free gift when i picked up my mama's moisturizer), all my face care and make~up comes from the drug store. look inside my make~up bag and you'll find products that i have used for **cough cough** 35 years **cough cough**. do you have any favorites that you will never ever out~grow?

inside my bag:

• rimmel lasting finish foundation in sand
• maybelline cover stick in medium
• covergirl professional loose powder in translucent medium
• covergirl classic color blush in soft mink
• maybelline expert eyes liner in blond
• maybelline great lash in dark brown
• clinique different lipstick in shy
• love's baby soft cologne spray (i am not even kidding)
• olay complete daily moisturizer

don't forget: it's important to remove your make~up every night to prevent clogged pores and break~outs. i still prefer noxzema, followed by a gentle astringent (i've used witch hazel since high school...thanks kat!). 

FLASHBACK 1981

kat and i are dieting. we don't NEED to be dieting but, like all teenage girls in the history of ever, we think we do. and we're doing it right. we have dexatrim. and we take 2 about 30 minutes before dad comes in with burger king. we figure he might be a little mad to find out we're taking diet pills so...we eat the whoppers...we eat the fries...and we're sick the rest of the night. that's the last time we take diet pills. we know they work, though, because we never ever want to see whoppers. ever. again.
FLASH FORWARD february 24, 2013
i'm watching the oscar red carpet arrivals on e. guiliana rancic and kelly osborne are hosting. i am struck by how amazing kelly looks. not because of her dress. not because of her makeup. because of the fact that she has curves. oh. she's not fat, by any stretch of the imagination. but she is not emaciated. and, sadly, i know there are people saying she's fat simply because she isn't a stick figure.
FLASH FORWARD today
fact: americans spend over $40 billion on dieting and diet related products each year.
fact: the average american woman is 5'4" and weighs 164 lbs...the average model? 5'11" and 117 lbs (what?).
fact: over 1/2 of teenage girls and 1/3 of teenage boys attempt to lose weight via unhealthy methods. those methods? skipping meals, fasting, laxatives, vomiting.
fact: in the us, 5 to 10 million people have eating disorders compared to 4 million people with alzheimer's.
fact: society's emphasis on appearance and thinness promotes unhealthy dieting and blinds us to people suffering from eating disorders.
fact: eating disorders have the highest mortality rate of any mental illness.
fact: an active teenager should be consuming AT LEAST 2500~3000 calories per day to maintain their weight. an active adult? 2000.
fact: as adults, we model the behaviors our children learn...this includes eating and exercise habits, as well as how we view our bodies and judge others.

national eating disorder awareness week is february 24~march 2. take this time to arm yourself with the tools that could help you, or someone you love. click here for more information.

other helpful links:

http://www.allianceforeatingdisorders.com/
http://www.something-fishy.org/
and lady gaga's site to help promote self~acceptance

                             

FLASHBACK 1826

"i'm free and i love to be free...to live my life the way i want...to say and do whatever i please..."
women weren't always excluded from voting. a rich old widow named lydia taft was allowed to vote in town meetings in uxbridge, massachusetts. and new jersey permitted women to vote if they had at least £50 in cash or property, referring to the voter as "he or she". a law was passed, in 1807, to exclude women. so, in 1826, a scottish woman named frances wright comes to america and doesn't like what she sees. she starts giving lectures on women's suffrage. then, in 1836, polish born ernestine rose campaigns so hard for the right to vote that she even gets a hearing with the new york state legislature, with a petition that only has 5 signatures.  in 1840 boston, lucretia mott and margaret fuller are fighting for women's suffrage. and, in 1848, lucretia mott becomes the first woman nominated for federal executive office when, liberty party nominee, gerrit smith calls for extending women the right to vote. that same year, strong women begin holding conventions for women's rights. these rights include more than just the right to vote. women also want social and legal equality. i could go on and on, and name every single important female that fought for women's rights, but we would be here all day...so i'm gonna skip to 1890. that year, two separate women's right organizations decide to merge. their leader? susan b. anthony. this group obtains a hearing before congress every year until 1919. on may 21, 1919, a bill introducing the 19th amendment is brought before congress for the 5th time. it passes the house with 42 votes more than necessary. on june 4, 1919, the bill passes the senate. it is not ratified by the 36 required states until august 26, 1920. 
FLASH FORWARD today
it's november 6, 2012. election day. i am so excited for this day to be over. my state, ohio, is a swing state. both parties have inundated my television with attack ads. i can't get on any form of social media (facebook, twitter, even pinterest) without being attacked by "friends" who think i'm an idiot if i don't vote how they vote. for a second, i consider not voting. then i remember how hard all these women fought for my right to cast that vote. i think about how lucky i am that the law DOESN'T require me to stay at home and not be heard. so, today, i will find my warmest coat (it's brrrrr chilly rabbit out there!) and go stand in line for an hour or two. and i will cast my vote for the candidate i feel represents me the best. and, win or lose, i will be satisfied that my voice was heard. 
male or female...please exercise your right today. let your voice be heard. 

                 

 

^lucretia mott and susan b. anthony^