WHAT UP WEDNESDAY?

"regrets...i've had a few..."
let me preface this by saying: i love my job. i really love my job. i'm not saving the world. or lives. i'm not discovering the secrets to the universe. or creating new, and better, technology. i'm simply selling handbags. but...i have fun everyday. i make people smile everyday. i inspire "plain janes" to step out of the box a bit...everyday. i love my job.
but...this week? this week i've overextended myself. just a tad. and it's making me CRAZY!!! and making me contemplate ways to get out of work (sword swallowing, anyone?). how did i let that happen, you ask? i picked up shifts, more than quadrupling my hours for the week (yay me!!), we bought a 20 game season ticket pack to see our cincinnati reds (yay us!!), we got invited to see another reds game (yay bk's boss!!), and, then, there's all the other things that must be done on any given day (laundry, cleaning, cooking, stocking the fridge). it's only wednesday and i'm exhausted. it's only wednesday and i need a vacation. 
it happens to everyone. we look at our weekly schedule and say to ourselves "sure, i can fit that in". we pick up extra shifts, or accept invitations to parties (or ball games). we look at our calendars...at the big to dos...but don't think about all the little things we have to do.
what can you do to keep yourself from getting overextended? or, worse, wishing a foul ball would give you a concussion?

• ask for help. i don't have to do all the little things alone. i KNOW that if i would only ask the bk would walk the dog, or do some laundry.  
• don't sweat the small stuff. it can wait. you don't HAVE to dust that table today. it will still be there tomorrow. so make a list this morning of 3 things that MUST happen today. focus on getting those taken care of. 
• keep a calendar. no excuses. you have a phone with a calendar on it, use it. and stick to it. that way you'll know if dinner with friends is actually possible that day.
• learn to say no *see "keep a calendar"*. if your calendar says you're busy busy just say no. explain to your friend that dinner is impossible and try to do it another day. 
• set aside time for you.  the real reason you feel overextended is you haven't had time to yourself. you haven't been able to open that book. or play that game. or just take a nap. with no "me time" you'll go crazy, so mark it on your calendar.

                           

                       

• sword swallowing
• painting nails in the car
• a full calendar
• candy crush addiction

don't worry. be happy.

THE SUNDAY PAPER (or blog or book or mag)

"today is where your book begins...the rest still unwritten..."
as i've said before, sundays are made for a hot cup o' joe, blankets, and reading. and every sunday i snuggle in my blankie, drink a cup of steaming (very caffeinated) coffee, and scroll thru my favorite blogs. and i am in L~O~V~E with bleubird.  i'm not quite sure how i stumbled across this beautiful little blog, but i really had to share it...
bluebird is written by "miss james" (a nickname)...she is married to aubrey...and they have 4 children (ages 12 to not quite 1). james did have an online vintage thrift shop that she has closed, indefinitely, since moving from texas to tennessee. she is a clothing designer, blogger, mother, home schooler, and photographer. she takes all the photos on her blog (with the, obvious, exception of shots of herself *aubrey takes those*. family shots are done with a tripod and self~timer) and they are amazing. she recently designed a line of children's sunglasses for bonlook that are super cute and i wish would fit me!!
each week you get a portrait of her kids, with stunning photos she's taken of each of the 4 children...also, what i want need wear read, which features a different person, each week, showing you their favorite product in each of the 4 categories. but my FAVORITE(!!!) entries are a video series that just started, conversations with birdie!! simply a must watch!! there have only been a few of these 3~5 minute conversations with her 2 year old, so it will be easy for you to catch up. if you don't find yourself laughing there is, quite simply, something wrong with you!!
this morning pour yourself a gigantic mug of java, head on over to miss james' blog, and see what you've been missing!!
happy sunday!! happy reading!!

^a glimpse into bleubird's life^

THINGS I LEARNED THIS WEEK

"you choke you learn...you laugh you learn...you choose you learn...you pray you learn...you ask you learn...you live you learn"

1. true love is shielding your eyes from horrible things *cough cough clowns cough cough*
2. two...two...two dogs are better than one
3. everybody loves bacon. everybody. LOVES. bacon.
4. emma starts all questions with "remember when you..."
5. abby should probably model
6. verizon should pay me a commission for assisting in the sale of a bose speaker and plan upgrade
7. patience is a virtue, especially in candy crush
8. when friends miss you, they show it by terrorizing you on facebook
9. i can make an irate customer leave smiling with my quick wit AND the coupon i keep in my pocket
10. today is national deep~dish pizza day...yummo!!!!!

^gypsy rose jarvis green ellis and trudy^

^the pesto~bacon was a huge hit^

^emma is a goofball^

^so pretty^

^finally off level 65^

^bird misses me^

^the magic^

^yummo^

^reminds me of emma...ha^

FABULOUS FREEBIES

"the best things in life are free..."
FLASHBACK march 28, 2013
my mama needs make~up and doesn't want to go to the mall. since i, in fact, work at a mall, i agree to pick it up. so, during my break, i head over to the clinique counter for mascara, lipstick, and a moisturizer. "go ahead a choose your gift." gift? what gift? "if you spend $25, or more, you get to choose between violets or pinks..." hmmmmm...let's go with violets! i tell mama about her free gift, although i'm sure she won't want it because of the colors. "you keep it." thanks! even though i'm a drugstore make~up kind of girl!!
FLASH FORWARD today
i just might have been turned on to the clinique mascara and lipstick. the lipstick is soft and buttery, and the color is light and natural. and the mascara makes my lashes look full. so...what exactly did i get with my free gift? i thought you would never ask!!

1 large make~up bag
1 pencil case
1 clinique 7 day scrub cream (1 oz)
1 clinique dramatically different moisturizing lotion (1 oz)
1 clinique different lipstick in "shy" (full size)
1 clinique high impact mascara in "black" (.14 oz)
1 clinique colour surge eye shadow duo in "twilight mauve/brandied plum" (.02 oz each)
1 clinique soft-pressed powder blusher in "pink" (.06 oz)
1 clinique true bronze pressed powder bronzer in "sunkissed" (.06 oz)
1 blush brush
1 shadow brush

hurry to your nearest macy's, or order online...offer is good thru april 21st, or while supplies last!!

FLASHBACK 1956

"i'm a barbie girl, in a barbie world...life in plastic, it's fantastic!" 
ruth handler takes a trip to europe with her children. she discovers a german doll named bild lilli, a blond bombshell that knows what she wants and will do whatever it takes to get it. lilli is marketed to adults, but little girls love her. so ruth takes lilli to her husband who, by an act of SHEER coincidence, just happens to be the cofounder of mattel! KABOOM!! barbie's born. 
FLASH FORWARD march 9, 1959
barbie (named after ruth's daughter) makes her debut at the american international toy fair. she wears a  black and white striped swimsuit and signature top knot. she is available as a blond or a brunette. AND she has a backstory. she is the daughter of george and margaret roberts of willows, wisconsin. because, you know, everybody needs a backstory. everybody. needs. a backstory.
FLASH FORWARD 1961
barbie meets ken. they have off and on relationships in the minds of little girls everywhere. for eternity. i don't believe they can ever truly be happy.
FLASH FORWARD march 9, 2009
barbie turns 50. AND she still looks fabulous. boo. 
FLASH FORWARD today
barbie turns 54 today. and she remains the leading fashion doll with, roughly, 946 million dolls sold every year. how will you celebrate barbie's birthday? i'm thinking pink cupcakes, dressing like a starlet, and going out and conquering my little corner of the world. won't you join me?

                  
 

FLASHBACK november 2012

"when i see your face...there's not a thing that i would change...'cause you're amazing just the way you are..."
a couple comes in with a broken handbag. "this is the first purse i ever bought that cost as much as a car payment! i can't believe the strap is already broken! and, i took it back to the store i bought it at, and she said she couldn't help me...but there has to be a way...i've only had this purse two months" i am positive i can help them. she has no receipt. she has no tag. she can't remember which credit card she used. one hour, and a bunch of laughs, later, she walks out with a brand new bag. five minutes later, a manager approaches me and tells me that she was stopped by a couple that gushed about their amazing experience...told her i was a truly magical person...and vowed to only shop at our store, even though it's  30 miles farther from home than our closest store. i float on a cloud the rest of my shift. who knew that a compliment would hold THAT kind of power? 
*special note: i, also, diagnosed the problem with the bag. during shipping, the handbags are carefully wrapped and taped, and it takes incredible feats of strength to unwrap them. someone had used a box cutter to slit the tape and had slit the strap on both ends. ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS look over your handbag (designer or otherwise) and look for nicks, slits, or scratches.* 
FLASH FORWARD today
yes. it's nice to be recognized for our hard work, or our new look, or our sense of humor. but the power of a compliment is often overlooked. a japanese study found that compliments can improve performance in every aspect, from school to social life to the workplace. *participants were required to complete a finger sequence on a keyboard as fast as they could in 30 seconds. one group received compliments, one group watched as other members were complimented, and one group rated their own performance. the group that received compliments improved their performance the following day.* compliments actually stimulate the same part of the brain (the striatum) that is activated when cash is given, prompting us to work harder. hmmmmm......
today is world compliment day. the idea behind it? much like valentine's day, secretary's day, or mother's day, it's a day to let the people in your life KNOW you appreciate them. no cards. no gifts. just a compliment. it's free. and it will make you both feel good.

^never underestimate a pat on the head^

FLASHBACK september 2012

"in ev'ry job that must be done there is an element of fun...you find the fun and snap! the job's a game..."
we move in to our new apartment...we, carefully, unpack boxes and put everything in its proper place. it takes about a month, but we get there.
FLASH FORWARD november 23, 2012
the day after thanksgiving. all the christmas boxes come out of storage. up goes the tree. up go the lights. christmas gifts are being purchased and placed all over the house. ugh! i can't find anything i need.
FLASH FORWARD january 6, 2012
the epiphany. time for the tree to come down. time to cut off the lights. all the christmas boxes go back in storage. wait? where is that packing tape? where are my scissors? where? where? where? ugh!! I CAN'T FIND ANYTHING!!!
FLASH FORWARD today
january is "get organized month" and i certainly know why! we have only been in our apartment 4 short months and, already, we need to reorganize. the beginning of the year is a great time to do it...out with the old and in with the new. need some help making the job less tedious? i have a suggestion...break it down to one task a day. 

GET ORGANIZED IN 15 DAYS 

day 1~medicine cabinets: check expiration dates and throw out old meds. make a list of things you may be running low on and be sure to replinish (tylenol or ibuprofen, band aids, neosporin)

day 2~coat closet: get rid of coats and jackets that don't fit, or never get worn (donate to a shelter). got hats and gloves loose? a cute basket or box for the shelf will come in handy OR that dust bag that came with your handbag you got for christmas makes a good catch all for them. 

day 3~under beds: do you use the space under your beds for storage, like i do? get under there and go thru all that stuff. get rid of anything that's unnecessary...those shoes you haven't worn in 5 years? guess what...you aren't going to ever wear them again! DONATE!!

day4~laundry room: go thru all those cleaners on the shelves. toss old bottles of detergent and fabric softener that don't even have enough for one load in them (i know you have them...don't even lie!). a heavy duty tote is a great way to keep cleaning products organized. and BONUS!!! you can carry it around the house as you clean, as opposed to trying to carry them all in your arms, or making several trips!

day 5~hand bag: take the time to go thru your bag. get rid of all those gum wrappers...take all loose change and put it in a jar to save for a special weekend or item you've been wanting. rule of thumb: you don't need a ton of change in your purse, you'll only weigh yourself down...i keep 4~quarters, 2~dimes, 3~nickels, and 4~pennies, all other change goes in the jar! also, take this time to get rid of near empty lip gloss, and lip sticks you know you'll never wear.

day 6~under sinks: get rid of near empty bottles of hair spray...gels you haven't used in so long they've become solid. that curling iron that broke 2 years ago? toss it. while you're at it, check your hair appliances...are the cords frayed or broken? time to get a new one.

day 7~fridge/freezer: check the expiration dates and toss any out~of~date items. leftovers? if you don't know how long they've been there...toss them. replace any often used items you're out of.

day 8~kitchen cabinets: spices that are over a year old may need replaced...broken pots/pans? why are you holding on to them? toss! and why are you keeping all those margarine tubs? they aren't microwave safe and they just make a mess! toss them and invest in a food storage set.

day 9~makeup case: mascaras and eyeliners really should be replaced every 6 months, but we all know that doesn't happen. at least do it at the new year!! take this time to get rid of old foundations (face it, you are NOT going to get that drop from the bottom of the jar). look at your brushes? can they be cleaned or maybe they need replaced. 

day 10~bedroom closets: now is the time: donate clothes you haven't worn in a year. but...but...i DO wear this member's only jacket?! no. no you don't. having trouble remembering if you did wear something in a year? try this: as you hang clothes back up, turn the hangers backward...as you wear and wash pieces, hang them back correctly. next year, anything on hangers that are still hung backwards get donated to charity.

day 11~linen closet: frayed towels? they go to the laundry room to become dust rags. pillows that have seen better days? toss them and get new ones for guests. sheets and blankets that have holes in them...TOSS! 

day 12~bedroom dressers: socks and chonies have holes in them? toss them...unless you're gonna darn the socks, and no one does that anymore! and holey chonies?! really? remember what your mama always said about having clean chonies in case you're in an accident...same thing with tee shirts and sweaters. AND, again, if it hasn't been worn in a year: DONATE!!

day 13~living room: magazines on the coffee table need to be up~to~date. you should NOT have last january's sports illustrated or good housekeeping sitting out. do you have remotes that you aren't even sure what they operate? or you have 45,000 remotes for all your electronics? maybe you should invest in a universal remote...

day 14~cars: go thru all the compartments in your car and get rid of trash...check registration and insurance cards and make sure you only have the CURRENT ones...also, check that you have jumper cables, a flashlight, flares, and a blanket for emergencies. or, better yet, an emergency kit.

day 15~jewelry box: broken jewelry? get it repaired. if it's beyond repair, take it to a respectable jeweler and have them purchase the gold...extra money goes in the jar. jewelry you never wear, and does not have sentimental value? donate it, or sell it.

if you have other spaces to organize (a garage, playroom, craft room) it may take you a few extra days. but, by breaking tasks down to 1 per day, it makes it far less painful!

HAPPY ORGANIZING!!

FLASHBACK 1966

festivus is celebrated, for the first time, in celebration of writer dan o'keefe's first date with his future wife. it eventually became the family's way of protesting the pressures and commercialism of christmas and is celebrated on december 23. 
FLASH FORWARD 1997
daniel o'keefe, dan's son, incorporates the holiday into an episode of "seinfeld" and people all over the country embrace it!
FLASH FORWARD december 22, 2012
i work retail. i work retail during the holidays. everybody warned me. everybody. warned. me. not to work retail during the holidays. "i know you! you're gonna want to punch people in the throat!" no i won't...don't be silly! "people are horrible!" nuh uh!! and they were wrong. most...not all...but most, of my customers have been amazing. until. until....3 days before christmas. now they're frantic. now they're demanding. now they're vicious and cruel. "i want to pay my bill." okay ma'am, how much would you like to pay? "all of it!! you people are so rude!! i'm paying it off and never using it again! i may never shop here!!" i'm so sorry ma'am, i wish there was some way i could help..."you can! you can tell them not to hire so many damn foreigners!! there is nothing i hate worse than a damn foreigner!!" *silence as i take her payment and feel horrible for the long line of foreigners that are ready to make purchases*..."you had a purse here two weeks ago...where is it?" describe it to me ma'am..."it's black...with a zipper" ummmmmm...."it looks just like this brown one, only it's black" we sold the last one and we won't be getting any new in...would you like me to see if another store has it? "yes...please! thank you!!" the closest store is in brooklyn..."can they ship it to me? i need it before christmas!!" ummmm....*okay. i am pretty magical and can get the customers ALMOST everything they want...but...BUT...it's 11:45p on a saturday night 3 days before christmas...it's not going to happen.*
FLASH FORWARD today
today is festivus..."a festivus for the rest of us"...and after the night i had i am all for protesting the commercialism and pressures of christmas. so, how exactly does one celebrate festivus?

1. get a festivus pole. it's just an unadorned aluminum pole...
2. prepare a festivus dinner...the meal is important for step 3...it should be turkey or ham followed by a pepperidge farm cake decorated with m&m's
3. the "airing of the grievances": this takes place during the meal. each member of the family takes turns lashing out at everyone for all the disappointments of the past year.
4. festivus miracles: a festivus miracle is an easily explainable event. example? you bump into me at the store..."what are YOU doing here?!" i work here. "it's a festivus miracle!!!"
5. feats of strength: after the festivus meal, the head of household chooses a challenger for the "feats of strength"...a wrestling match. festivus does not end until the head of household is pinned. 

a silly and fun party idea as you prepare for the real deal...a mere 2 days away...

                      

FLASHBACK christmas 1992

"a sack full of toys means a sack full of joys..."
the boys  wake me up with giggling and squealing. it's 5am, christmas morning. not only has santa been by and loaded them down with presents, but the grandparents, and their uncle, have sent a box full of gifts. they rip through all the paper, sticking bows on each other's heads. "oh! wow!! this is cool!!". "this is mine!! i love it!!". "look at this mama!!". then, they open them. large packages from my lil bro. machine guns. machine guns that make LIFE~LIKE noise. machine guns that, upon inspection, have batteries that CANNOT be removed. ack! all christmas day....BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!!!! early the next morning...RAT A TAT TAT TAT!!! on...and on...and on...and on...and on...ugh
FLASH FORWARD today
i am perusing the internet and notice an article about unsafe toys this holiday season. what makes a toy dangerous? lead paint continues to be a problem. phthalates, used to soften pvc, are known to cause changes in hormone levels and birth defects. extremely strong magnets can pinch fingers and are a choking hazard. obviously, small parts pose a choking hazard. and, the surprise to me...noisy toys! did you know that there is a limit of 65 decibles for toys? if a toy exceeds 85 decibles, prolonged exposure can cause gradual hearing loss! i am NOW blaming my lil bro for the hearing loss in my right ear...instead of rock concerts, blaring my stereo, the scarring on my ear drum (caused by a combination of q~tip and jumping toddler), or the ear canal that is smaller than it's supposed to be. nope...it's all lil bro and those stupid NOISY machine guns...

so...what toys should you avoid this year? the 2012 trouble in toyland reports the following:

• dragster cars (toys 'r us): small parts, choking hazard
• bowling game (dollar plus store): small parts, choking hazard
• toy food (walmart): choking hazard
• dora backpack (target): contains phthalates
• morphbot (dollar tree): contains lead
• snake eggs (dollar tree): choking hazard
• dora guitar (target): noisy, exceeds 85 decibles
• car wheel/horn (toys 'r us): noisy, exceed 85 decibles

happy shopping!!

                               

FLASHBACK december 6, 1990 (i may have just made that up)

the best things in life are free...but you can give them to the birds and bees...i want money..." 

we are living in durango, colorado, on the side of a mountain. literally on the side of a mountain (the house even came with a snow plow. why is there a snow plow? "i don't know(?)." we soon found out.). trips to town are a huge deal and involve groceries for the week...videos for the week...and a special trip to mcdonald's for the play place. the video store we go to is family owned (no blockbuster existed) and the owner  follows me around (offering advice), leaving her cash drawer open. the kids are free to roam wherever. this day is no different. i pick out several movies the kids will love and off we go. at the grocery, dustin wants to get a toy out of the gum ball machines. dustin, i don't have any quarters. "i have a quarter". you're 3, where did YOU get a quarter? "from that drawer full of money at the video store". wait? WHAAAT?!!?!!
FLASH FORWARD december 6, 2012
i work retail in a major department store. people come in daily and make payments on their store credit card. most people don't have a statement on them, or even know what their balance is. the transaction goes down like this: customer swipes their card...computer tells me their minimum due and the due date...customer gives me an amount to pay and i enter it in the computer...customer swipes debit card...computer prints out receipt. done. simple. some people actually have a statement with them. they hand me their statement and a check and i have to key everything in by hand. what? this is ridiculous! get with the times, man!! this transaction ends with me handing them back their voided check and them asking me why i'm not keeping it. ummmm...because we already have your money and a scanned image of your check. duh doy! but today! today the weirdest thing happened! "i would like to pay my bill". swipe your card in the machine for me, sir. "oh, here's my statement". (ugh...i have to key it in by hand!!) thank you, sir. how much will you be paying?. "$42.00".  how will you be paying for this today? "cash" wait? what? nobody does that?!! nobody. ever. does that!! he hands me two 20's and two 1's and i hand him his receipt. i've opened the cash drawer before. we have to open the registers every morning and count the money to verify how we are starting the day. and we have to do it every night to determine how much we made. occasionally, we have to make a deposit when we close, but...most often...we are just collecting coupons and gift cards for recycling. 
more often than not, people are paying with plastic. i'll admit, i fall into this category. i never...hardly ever...have cash on me. sometimes it can be really frustrating: i want a diet dr pepper...the machine takes $1.35...i dig around and all i have is a gum wrapper and a safety pin. UGH! but, then again, there are plus sides to sticking with plastic. like? well...it's easy: the cashier tells me what i owe, i swipe my card and go. i can pay via the internet: last night, i ordered pizza online and paid online...when i walked into larosa's i signed a slip and walked out...easy peasy. and it's clean. if you pay with coins or paper money, that money is being passed between you and the cashier...if one of you has a cold or virus, you could, potentially, be passing it to the other thru the exchange of the money. however, if you pay with plastic, no contact is made...tah dah! no germs passed...the benefits for businesses? safety: with most customers paying with plastic, the amount of cash for deposit is limited making it less inviting to would be thieves. seriously? who wants to go to jail over $50? again, cleanliness, for the EXACT same reasons. and, most importantly, no need for your cash drawer to be open, tempting a 3 year old to steal a quarter.
happy spending!!

 

*thanks dad!!*

FLASHBACK december 2007

"shopping online for deals on some writable media...i edit wikipedia" 
it's christmas time...noah's girlfriend hands me a package and she's clearly embarrassed. she is apologizing before i even open it. it's a "sweeney todd" candle holder and candlestick. "it said it was wood! i thought it was hand~carved!" it's really cool, i love it. "but it's made out of a beer bottle! i wish i had time to go get something else!!" i can guarantee i won't get another gift like this! i really do love it, and you know it's the thought that counts!! and...ps...i still have it...
FLASH FORWARD today
everybody has been scammed while online shopping at one time or another. the picture and description makes an item seem so much better than it is. in general, it's items found on ebay or craig's list that are the culprits. but, it can happen with major sites, as well. i once bought a chess set, for the ex, on jc penney's site. it wasn't available in store, and as soon as it arrived i knew why! it said it was resin pieces with an oak board...it meant the BOTTOM of the pieces was resin and the board was STAINED an oak color! ugh...but things have gotten much better and many more people are doing their shopping online. why? because they can do it from the comfort of their own home. because it gets shipped to their home, or office, and can come already wrapped. and, because they can find better deals just by typing a number into a search engine.
so, maybe, you took a turkey nap and slept through all the black friday deals? or, should i say BLACK THURSDAY? maybe, like me, you worked black friday and just wanted to sleep when you clocked out? possibly, you simply refused to go anywhere near a mall? no big deal...today was designed just for you. IT'S CYBER MONDAY!!! today is the day to get all the super deals online shopping has to offer and i'm gonna tell you about the best ones!

SEARS: up to 50% off, plus an extra 10%, winter coats, scarves, gloves, hats, and holiday dresses. 
AMAZON: save up to $200 on a cannon dslr lense
KHOL'S: 20% off all purchase and free shipping
MACY'S: various sales on all items...free shipping on purchases $50 or more
JC PENNEY: free shipping with no minimum purchase
WALMART: samsung 55" 1080p class lcd smart 3d hdtv - $1498 ($1,000 savings)
TARGET: nikon coolpix l610 16mp digital with 14X optical zoom $149 (save $100)

happy shopping!!